Florida Man February 1 - Machete Madness

Florida Man February 1 – Machete Madness

February 1 brings us two Florida man incidents that occurred outside supermarkets. It looks like it’s supermarket day today. It shows no matter where you are in Florida. You are never out of the reach of a good Florida man story. Read the full stories below:


Florida Man February 1 – Arrested for Swinging a Sword in a Road Attack.

Zephyrhills, Florida – On February 1, police arrested a Florida man after an alleged attack with a machete. The event might seem comical since it’s not every day you see a man take a sword to the grocery store. That may seem unusual to most American, but maybe not if you live in the sunshine state.

The Florida Man in question here is Jonathan Bailey (34), the guy who happened to cut the victim’s hand on Tuesday night. The incident occurred just outside a Walmart.

The victim stated that Bailey approached him as he parked his car in the parking lot. Bailey parked his car next to the victim and “swung a sword” at him. Although the attack didn’t claim the poor victim’s soul, the sword cut the victim’s hand and left a severe wound.

An incident like this always has a reason. And for a Florida Man, the reasons can be somewhat trivial. The victim told the officers that the incident could have happened because he cut off Bailey in traffic. 

Feeling angry and annoyed, Bailey decided to take this matter into his own hands. He grabbed his weapon and cut the victim’s hand just like that. 

Shortly after arriving, the police arrested Bailey for battery with a deadly weapon. The officers took him to jail, receiving a $10,000 bond. He didn’t seem to be accompanied by a lawyer.

The victim recovered well from the extended cut between his index finger and thumb. However, the wound has left a rather nasty scar.

Florida Man February 1 - Machete Madness

A Wild Florida Man Attack with Machete, Broomstick, and His Teeth

Miami Dade County, Florida – Police charged another Florida man with attempted murder and robbery outside a Miami Dade county supermarket.

The incident happened in the morning, at around 8:30 a.m while the victim, identified only as Donald, was waiting for a ride to work just outside the mart.

The deranged Florida man approached him and asked for money. The victim felt that this was an attempt to rob him. Donald refused the man’s request.

Not feeling too happy about the reaction, the suspect initially decided to attack him with a broomstick. After using the broomstick, he switched to his machete, continuing to pound Donald repeatedly. In the end, he bit Donald’s face and robbed everything he had. 

Donald said to the police that he had lost his phone and $350. A later investigation also mentioned that Donald suffered from severe bodily and face injuries. After the attack, Donald ran into a nearby gas station. Paramedics brought him to the hospital shortly after.

Later police identified the suspect as Demetrick Psych Sanders, age 45. Police later arrested him after Donald saw him hanging around the same supermarket.

Final Thoughts

People can be random sometimes, and thus you need to be always careful when outside. Even in the middle of the day Florida can be a dangourous place. You should be ready for anything in Florida.

If you want to know more about Florida man make sure to check out my other posts . If you would like to request a date please do so in the comments below.

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